Madam, Was Your Chicken Left Unattended?

The Scene :

The kitchen, Sunday evening just after CountryFile

The Victim :

Left-over barbeque-style chicken breast, cooked for Sunday dinner, covered with foil and secured on kitchen worktop

The Crime Scene :

The Suspect :

Name:

Eddie

Age:

 7

Distinguishing Features:

Rips in both ears

 Slight swagger when walking due to a back leg injury as a kitten

Known Aliases:

"monster"

"satan's cat"

"he's evil that cat"

"monkey"

"eddiekins"

Previous convictions :

1. The taking and carrying upstairs to the bedroom of a packet of fish taken out of the freezer to defrost for tea

2. The scoffing of a bowl of grated cheese left out on the kitchen worktop ready to go on top of the pasta for tea. Two incidents.

3. Due to a strange fruit fetish, helping himself to some sliced strawberries left in a bowl on the kitchen worktop

4. The purloining of small items from the bathroom, namely a sponge and a mini bottle of bubble bath, which were carried downstairs and abandoned in the hall

5. The ability to make small tins of Vaseline simply vanish to be found several months later under the bed. His current record for this is five.

Verdict :

Guilty.........very!